How to Create Happiness
Written by: Selysa Love
Your reality is a reflection of the stories that you tell yourself. You learn your belief systems very early, as a child, and then you move through the rest of your life creating experiences to match your beliefs. You look for evidence that these beliefs are true. They engrain deeply into your subconscious until they are accepted as fact and reality. By adulthood, most people aren't even aware of their beliefs and stories.
Often, you may tell yourself stories of not-enoughness and pain, which creates a reality where you will never be satisfied nor at peace. A great way to change your reality is to identify your deeply held stories and then to write a new reality. This is called affirmation creation.
If you would like to take one step closer to a happy life, take out a pen and a piece of paper and stick with this exercise until the end.
1. Write down any of these common self-limiting beliefs that you may be [accidentally] telling yourself:
I am unlovable.
I am not pretty/handsome/fit enough.
I am too old/young.
I am not smart enough.
I don't have enough time/money.
I have to work extremely hard to get money.
Rich people are evil and greedy.
I will never make enough money.
I am unwise with my money.
I will never find another partner.
Love is too painful. I will get hurt again.
Everyone will reject me, so there is no point in trying.
I will never accomplish anything great in my life.
I am not worthy of success.
I am not worthy of wealth.
I don't have enough credentials.
I don't have enough experience.
2. Choose three of the beliefs that you wrote down, and write three affirmations that you would rather tell yourself, using the following guidelines:
Keep affirmations short and specific.
Use positive statements. Avoid inserting negative words such as, never, no, or not. Rather than saying, "I am not afraid," you could say, "I am courageous."
Use the present tense, as if it is already true.
Preface affirmations with, "I am."
For example, if you have the belief, "I am not smart enough," your new affirmation could be, "I am brilliant."
Your list should look something like this:
Affirmation #1:______________________________________
Affirmation #2:______________________________________
Affirmation #3:______________________________________
Your affirmations should be treated gingerly, like a newborn baby. They are working to rewrite a whole lifetime of the opposite story. If you slip into the old thought pattern, just noticing the pattern is a huge accomplishment! Don't expect a lifetime of self-limiting beliefs to disappear in one day. Work with them with patience, love, and compassion.
3. [Do not skip this step!] Put your affirmations all over the place, where you will see them all of the time: your phone screen saver, a sticky note by your keys, your bathroom mirror, your steering wheel, etc. Litter your most frequently looked at items with your affirmations so that you are constantly reminded of your new paradigm, retraining your brain to align with the new reality.
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